Leading for a moment - Abigail
1 Samuel 25
A read through 1 Samuel with your eyes open to Israel’s leaders shows that they, as individuals are very much like us today. They suffer from similar weaknesses, make similar errors and are given similar opportunities. When you think about it, it is not really surprising because the big lessons we learn from 1 Samuel are not so much lessons we learn about leaders, but lessons we learn about God – the God who is unchanging.
Eli fails to lead, so God fails to speak - the consequences of living disregarding God. Samuel listens to God and seeks to obey – and God makes him a great leader and hero for Israel. And Jonathon who delegates his leadership to the true leader – David.
Leadership is really about influence, it is about seeking to influence change in the lives of others. And to one degree or another, we are all leaders – leaders in our families, leaders at work or home.
You want to influence your family to grow and make wise decisions. You want to influence work colleagues to work hard, to fit into the team, or even to come along to church with you. You want to influence the children in your Sunday school class, to live lives that follow Jesus. This is Leadership
Sometimes we find it hard to think of this as leadership. We are so used to the typical models of leadership, with typical ‘up-front’ characters. But Leadership doesn’t always come from where you expect it.
When it comes to leadership there are 4 types of people.
- Those who want to be leaders, and are.
- Those who don’t want to be leaders, but are!
- Those who want to be leaders but aren’t
- Those aren’t leaders and don’t want to be.
The amazing thing is, God chooses leaders from each of these brackets - he chooses people like Abigail.
1 Samuel 25 is a fantastic chapter. Sandwiched between two equally gripping stories - David sparing Saul’s life in the cave at En-Gedi, and his sparing Saul’s life again at Israels’ campsite in Ziph (Remember them, they will come up again later), chapter 25 is an exciting, fast moving chapter that would make a great movie. It is a high tension, fast moving thriller with the bad guy, the good guy, and the girl (The good guy gets the girl…).
But unlike the movies, the heroic leader is not who you might first expect.
If you were casting the movie, who would be your leading hero?
Would it be Nabal – the wealthy land owner, keeper of thousands of animals which he must feed and nurture, with servants to match? Or maybe David, the King in waiting, with a heroic band of butch men who do his bidding. He has a wealth of experience in battle and is comfortable amongst kings and princes. But in reality of course it is Abigail - the beautiful, sensible woman, living in a culture dominated by men, with a husband who is mean, dishonest and does what he likes.
In the plot of 1 Samuel 25 she stands out. Nabal is ill-tempered (v17, 25), David is hot-tempered (with 400 hundred swords making the point!) but Abigail stands out as the even-tempered and clear thinking leader for the moment. So, the story pivots, not around the ‘King To Be” David, but around Abigail. She may not spend her life in a position of leadership, but in this story, she is the most important human character, the person who speaks the most important and significant words (Abigail’s words are intended to be the climax of the chapter), the person who shows bravery in fear, ingenuity and direction. She is the leader for the moment.
So, what do we learn from the life of Abigail about the leaders God uses.
There are 3 things.
- Leaders think clearly about the big picture.
- Leaders remain disciples
- Good leaders recognise God leads.
So firstly,
1. Leaders think clearly about the big picture.
What stands out about Abigail is that she is even-tempered and sensible. This is the mark of a good leader.
Leaders need to learn clear thinking, not driven by their emotions. Don’t get me wrong, passion is important. There are many occasions in David’s life when that is exactly what he is praised for, but it is never at the exclusion of clear thinking.
The reason clear thinking is so important is because the mission is so important. Abigail’s words in the middle of Ch 25 (v25-31) are not only the pivotal verses in the story, but they make the most important point for us tio hear and understand.
Abigail shows her respect for David, she takes him a gift, calling him “Lord” 10 times (in the Hebrew...I’m told!) and she even takes responsibility for her husbands actions – despite not knowing what had happened until it was too late. She agrees with David that her husband is an ill-tempered fool – his parents got that right when they named him, and he does deserve David’s wrath…
But…
‘David – you know who you are! You are the Lord’s anointed “the Lord will surely reward you for you are fighting the Lord’s battles…When the Lord has done all he promised and has made you leader of Israel, don’t let this be a blemish on your record”.
She knows and sees the big picture, and understands that the key issue that should temper David’s actions is how it affects the big picture, David’s future throne and reign. This planned murder would definitely throw a spanner in the works!
This is so important – leaders must think clearly in order to achieve their purpose effectively.
- Parents – what is the big picture, your vision as you seek to lead your children? It is probably that they would grow up to be mature, respectful, independent and resourceful adults, who know how to love and be loved and to seek to live for Christ. As you work with your children towards this vision, teaching and disciplining, playing and talking you must think clearly in order that you are not sidetracked, hindered or stumble in this task. When tough decisions come don’t respond out of passion and reaction, but from clear thinking, with the bigger picture in mind.
- At work – what is your vision as you seek to lead other staff at work? I suspect it would be something along the lines of developing or being a part of a team that is efficient and resourceful, an environment where excellence is expected and achieved and people enjoy their work environment. As you work towards that vision, how do you respond to the new employee who is young, impetuous, doesn’t fit in the team and doesn’t know their job? Do you get frustrated and irritated, knowing you’d be better off without them and so ignore them, hoping they will do something worthy of the sack? Or do you invest time and energy into them now in order that they might become efficient, resourceful and an integral part of the team and an encouragement to the rest of the team as they see the change.
- As a church. At Bethany City Church our vision is to “build a community whose aim is to live and love like Jesus and get the people of Sunderland into heaven” This is who we believe God wants us to be, and what he wants us to work towards. There are plenty of things, good things that might come our way, things other churches are doing that we could do. But the question must be, will they become a hindrance to us continuing on the path that we believe God has called us to be on. Thinking clearly about the big picture.
- As an individual – What is your vision for your own life – and more specifically for your own walk with God? What positive steps are you taking to more faithfully be the person God want you to be? It is interesting how Jesus developed this very same idea.
“Seek first his Kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” Matthew 7:33
Elsewhere in Colossians, Paul said - “Work hard and cheerfully at whatever you do, as though you wee working for the Lord rather than for people.” Col 3:23
Each of us should be able to say what our purpose is – what God wants to do with and in us. Can you?
For David, his purpose was very clear and Abigail knew that his actions would damage his ability to achieve his purpose effectively, so she appealed to those things in order to stop David in his tracks. She knew the big picture and was driven by clear thinking and common sense, not passion. She was the leader of the moment.
But Abigail also knew how it would affect David himself – she understood that a part of thinking clearly is learning to protect your heart. She understood what this impetuous act would have on David.
“Then you won’t have to carry on your conscience the staggering burden of needless bloodshed and vengeance” (v31)
The leader must learn that they need to protect their heart in order to be able to live and learn in a trouble free, godly way, without being burdened. And this too needs clear thinking.
When we lead, how are we protecting ourselves? How are we keeping ourselves from temptation, keeping ourselves from overtiredness, keeping ourselves from sin that will ultimately be harmful for us and stop us leading effectively? It is an ongoing challenge.
As I mentioned earlier, it is interesting that in both the previous and the next chapters, David was in similar situations with Saul. In Chapter 24, David finds himself in the cave – his arch-enemy Saul, who is out to get him is sat, reading the newspaper (the usual male pursuit that accompanies a visit to the toilet!) in front of him. David could have finished him off there and then without raising a sweat. But, on this occasion he was thinking clearly and was controlled by an even temper. The guard to his heart were up and he responded accordingly. (24:6. Despite a little wobble, he did the right thing!)
So why, in Chapter 25, just a few verses later is he in danger of falling into the trap he was so aware of in the cave?
Who knows, but it teaches us a very important lesson. We are inconsistent, impetuous, and we need a God who has leaders for the moment to help us, just like David to help us protect our hearts and keep the big picture.
And when he sends them, we must listen.
2. Leaders must remain disciples.
To be fair, David comes out of this story of inconsistency in not too-bad a state, not because he made wise decisions but because he is still teachable. He is a disciple of God and is willing to listen to Abigail.
One of Nabal’s biggest faults was that he didn’t listen to anyone, and certainly not a servant.
“He’s so ill-tempered that no one can even talk to him”(v17)
But David, in contrast did listen, and was willing to learn – even from those who don’t appear to be leaders or teachers.
We have all met people who are unteachable, some of us at times can be those people. People who have all the answers and have nothing left to learn. The problem is, what follows is the Nabal effect – they end up mean, dishonest, independent, sneering and insulting – and at the heart of it insecure. History is littered with leaders like that. Men and women who couldn’t be corrected, helped or taught.
But leaders who remain disciples cannot be like that. There is at heart a knowledge that they are works in progress, still learning, still able to be taught and able to learn from anyone – even the most unlikely places. And on this, David passed the test.
And he passed it, because he knew that ultimately it wasn’t him who was the leader, or even Abigail. It was God.
3. Good leaders recognise God leads
The reason that the most unlikely person can be the leader of the moment is because it is really God who leads. Four times we are reminded that God has stopped David from this murderous act. (See v26, 33, 34 and 39, once from Abigail and 3 times from David) God is the leader, and any leader worth his salt recognises that.
A quick glance at v32-34 make that clear.
1 Samuel is a record of lots of things, with some fantastic characters and stories, but right at the heart is the record of a God who leads his people, and he does it through weak and feeble people like you and me.
God is the one who stops David from taking things into his own hands (“Bless you for keeping me from murdering the man” v33), and God is the one who later does work in judgement against Nabal. God is the one who has worked in Abigail’s good sense (“…the God of Israel, who kept me from hurting you” v34).
Abigail may not be a Samuel who is remembered for his hearing from God throughout his whole life in spectacular ways. But, but she does stand out, by her sensible, wise decisions and words, her understanding of the big picture and her acknowledgement of David as the King in waiting, as a woman used by God, to lead for an important, life changing moment.
We are not all built for life-long leadership roles, for spectacular ministries or positions in life. But we can all play important life changing roles by our sensible and wise decisions, by our wise words, by our clinging on the big picture and our acknowledgement that we serve the true King whom David points too, the one whose Kingdom will last forever. We can be the leader of the moment in the lives of our families, friends, colleagues.
We will need to be clear minded, keeping our eyes on the big picture – the Kingdom of heaven and what it means to do a job, raise a family, be involved in a church and have a relationship with God that plays its part in, and seeks to build that Kingdom. We need to remain teachable and not allow independence and insecurity to creep in, and we need to acknowledge that ultimately God can and will use us, because he is the leader.